God Save the Queen, Zelensky and the Daily Mail

I really like Peter Hitchens (writes for the Mail). He’s brave. He puts his genuine beliefs out there, even when he knows his is the minority view. He’s also not afraid to publicly admit when he’s changed his mind. He used to be a member of the Labour party, then he joined the Conservatives, but left again when he realised his take on conservativism didn’t align with that of the party.

And he’s a good writer. That and a sense of humour earn my unfettered respect and admiration.

So when yesterday he wrote yet another piece criticising Ukraine, lambasting the West’s almost unanimous support for the country, and defending (up to a point) Russia, I felt I had to tread carefully before blogging any disagreement.

Reparations, Republics and Realpolitik

I used to enjoy Royal tours. They were joyous, relaxing (for observers) spectacles. A chance for the UK to shine vicariously through the smiles, deference, handshakes, hats, bouquets and frock-changes of Her Maj or any one of our numerous HRHs. Behind the scenes, investments were discussed, deals were struck, and everyone parted the best of friends, a little bit richer in ways other than money.

But this Caribbean trip is irritating the hell out of me. If it’s not Kate’s garish gowns shoe-horned around her too-skinny frame (eat some carbs, Girl, and strap on a pair of kilos), it’s her jaw-aching, wrinkle-inducing grin-à-la-Joker, or Will’s self-flagellating hand-wringing over our colonial past, serving sycophancy to the historically ignorant and ammo to the opportunistic who no longer want his Granny (or his Dad or him) as Head of State. More than anything, they want ‘reparations’.

It'll all end in tears.

Oh, what a lovely war!

Some might think it’s ‘sick’ to be light-hearted at the expense of the war in Ukraine. However, if the Ukrainian army can play “Don’t worry, be happy” in front of military barricades to keep their spirits up, then I can engage my weird and not universally loved sense of humour as a morale (if not a moral) booster.

Traumatic as it is, the war in Ukraine appeared to have united Europe, and united Britain and Europe, apart from a few wobbles early on when the Germans seemed to care more about their gas supplies than the lives of innocents, this united front was going swimmingly. We all managed to put aside our differences so that the EU could do its thing and the UK could do its thing independently and free from EU shackles, thanks to Defence Secretary Ben Wallace. He has outshone Foreign Secretary Liz Truss just as Michael Gove outshone Home Secretary Priti Patel. Not the finest hour for the ladies, is it. (I can say that; the men can’t.)

The Clown Prince and the Lord

I’m sure Hollywood will make a film about this; it’s full of intrigue, red herrings, outlandish personalities and a dead dog. They can even nick my title if they want, reminiscent of the Olivier/Monroe classic The Prince and the Showgirl.

The storyline is about BoJo forcing through a Lordship for one of his Russian oligarch chums in 2020. It’s topical on many fronts – BoJo bashing, oligarch bashing, unelected-upper-house bashing. I sense I’m supposed to find BoJo guilty on all counts – cronyism, security-breaching, hypocrisy, elitism, another party-gate (he enjoyed Olly-Oligarch’s hospitality) – but as evidenced in my previous blogs, while I can admit to BoJo’s failings, I can’t help but forgive him because the lovable rogue got Brexit done.

Don't forget about Zimbabwe

Here’s a mind game for you – what do net zero, Ukraine and Zimbabwe have in common? We’ll need a couple of other mind games to figure that one out.

Despite throwing my ha’penny-worth behind the net-zero aspirations of politicians, businesses and fellow environmental campaigners, I’ve persistently counselled against prioritising net zero as the be-all and end-all of policy making. Indeed, on occasions I appear to argue against net zero, the proposed Whitehaven coal mine being a case in point (mentioned in not one but two previous blogs, so I won’t bang on about it again here).

I argue thus, because carbon-induced climate change is just one existential threat facing humanity – sorry, the planet. There’s also dwindling biodiversity, toxic pollution, nuclear warfare, biological warfare, any warfare, pandemics, food insecurity, energy insecurity, antibiotic dependency ... 

A week is a long time

Last Sunday, I took umbrage at the Sunday Times for an opinion piece that dismissed me, most of my friends and acquaintances, and thousands of other decent, law-abiding, intelligent, compassionate, conscientious people as Nimbys, because we object to the destruction of farmland, ripping up of trees, blighting of landscapes and spewing of greenhouse gases by building homes (mostly of dubious quality) and roads and warehouses in numbers we don’t need in locations that can’t accommodate them, because the Sunday Times, politicians and planners don’t understand the economics of the housing market, how to level up, nor the symbiotic relationship between all things nature and human wellbeing.

When it comes to long sentences, eat your heart out, Samuel Johnson.

By contrast, this week I’m the newspaper's biggest fan because of an article by Matthew Syed.